Security in Him:

“May the Lord answer you when you are in trouble; may the God of Jacob make you secure!”- Psalm 20:1

           

            Alright dear sister I am a little upset. It seriously upsets me when I stand in the line at the store and I see all the headlines plaster across the magazines on the racks. “How to Look Good Enough for Him or “How to Make Him Fall in Love with You.”  Seriously, I am so sick of all the media throwing in the faces of beautiful women these lies that we have to be, good enough for him, thin enough for him, pretty enough for him, and the list goes on and on. Enough, please stop with these lies. Women desire and long to be told they are captivating, desirable and pretty. I completely get it. What woman would not want to hear that come out of the mouth of a man? I will be the first in line to sign up for that.  Any woman would thrive under that kind of affirmation from a man. However, what if no man ever tells you that beloved?  Or what if he only says it, because he wants something or because he is suppose to, but to be honest he is not really feeling it. Dear sister, is there no validation for a woman apart from a man? Do we only think we are valuable and have worth once we catch the eye of a man? From walking through the stores lately, I think that pretty much sums up what the world is telling women now. No wonder we are all plagued with massive insecurities issues.

            Dear one, I am going to be up front and say that men are not our problems but instead, it is what we are trying to get from them that messes us up. In the sweet words of my dear sister Beth Moore,” we use guys like mirrors to see if we’re valuable, beautiful, desirable, and worthy of notice. “  Sweet sisters, we are trying to get confirmation and security from earthly men and even with all the love and compassion, earthly men simply cannot fill that security for you. They barely are getting along with their own security issues that the world is throwing at them as well. They do not have any to spare for us sweet sisters. We must find our true security, worth, and value in the one who created us in His own image. (Genesis 1:27) Beloved you must draw close to the One and only One who can bring you this immense security. We, as women, are bombarded everyday with so much that causes us to have doubts and insecurities and we are craving to find a source that will never run dry.

“The Lord will guide you always ; he will satisfy your needs in a sun-scorched land  and will strengthen your frame. You will be like a well-watered garden,  like a spring whose waters never fail. “ Isaiah 58:11

He  alone will satisfy you. Just reflect in all that love for a second. No earthly man can make you as richly satisfied as the Lord. Let’s find our true security in the Lord and not throw all that at the men that come into our life. Show them that you are a strong, Christian woman rooted firmly in the garden of the Lord.  (Side note to add, a man is so much more attracted to a secure woman then to an emotional train wreck who insists he could complete her. )  In the words of another dear sister Christy Nockels, “ Men are not drawn to hysterical needy women.”  Wow, I am humiliated to say that I have played this role in the past but through the trials the Lord has carried me through I am finding my true love and security in Him. He never fails you, He will always be there, you can always trust Him, you can always count on Him and He will never just walk out on you. No other man can make that promise to you dear sister. Not one! Only your True Lover, Jesus can make all those promises and NEVER break them.  Take hope and have faith in Him and show earthly men where you stand. Do not believe the lies of the media, magazines and this world. Claim victory over it and stand strong (Psalm 90:17).  

“He will cover you with feathers, and under his wings you will find refuge; his faithfulness will be your shield and rampart” Psalm 90:4

“Respect Yourself and Your Brothers”

 She is clothed with strength and dignity; she can laugh at the days to come.

Proverbs 31:25

 Have you ever been beside a dear sister and you are thinking to yourself, “um your skirt is to short or your top is to low.” Is it just me or does there seem to be a trend on, less is more, when it comes to ladies deciding on what clothes to wear?  I am not talking about worldly ladies; I am talking about Christian ladies, dear sisters in Christ.  I would like to just share my thoughts on the issue of dress, as it relates to Christian women. Please remember anything I write on my blog is my personal opinion and I respect and love every one of you but this is just how I feel about the matter.

            As Christian women we are suppose to be a city on a hill for this dark world (Matthew 5:14). We are not of this world ladies and we are called to do things differently because of that ( John 15:19). We belong to Jesus. We were bought with his blood and our life is His (1 Peter 2: 9). .He gave His life for you dear sister, and died the cruelest and most awful death just to prove to you how much He loved you (Romans 5:8). Your body is not your own, it is a temple with the Holy Spirit living in it and the Lord should be honored in how you dress His body (I Corinthians 6:19-20, Romans 6:13, I Corinthians 12:27). 

            Before I go any further I want to make one thing clear. I am not by any means saying you cannot look pretty, adorable, beautiful, precious, cute ect. I am simply saying that yes, you can look adorable but in the words of a wonderful sister, Beth Moore, “Be adorable Christian women.”  Ladies, if you want to see what a adorable Christian lady dresses like  Google, Beth Moore. You will not find a more adorable dressed, God fearing woman.  Now, what does it mean to be an adorable Christian lady? It simply means that when you dress yourself do you dress yourself and look in the mirror and say,” I look like a beautiful lady of the Lord, or do you look at yourself and say,” I hope that handsome boy will notice me.”  There is a huge difference in how we dress dear sister. If we are dressing to grab the attention of a dear brother by wearing a low top, tight jeans, or a short skirt, then I can tell you right now that your motives are off.  Now, before you throw tomatoes at me please hear me out. I am not saying you cannot wear cute dresses, shirts, shorts, and pants. I am simply saying that when you get dress please be mindful of each garment you are putting on. Is your top to low? Are you showing, what should only be reserved for your husband’s eyes? Is your shirt to thin? Can you see too much? Maybe you should layer the shirt?  Is your dress to tight? Are you making your brothers in Christ stumble as you walk by (Matthew 5:28)? These are things we must be thinking sweet sister as we dress because not only are we to respect our body but we are to respect the eyes of our brothers in Christ.  

            Ladies we should honor our Christian brothers and watch the way we dress so that we do not cause them to stumble ( I Corinthians 10:32). The Lord created men and women very differently. Men are visually stimulated and enjoy looking at a pretty woman. There is nothing wrong with that, that is simply the way God wired men and therefore that means as Christian sisters we have to take caution in how we present our self to them.   That does not mean that you cannot look attractive. Girlfriend, a man wants his woman to be attractive but that does mean we proceed with caution.  Dear sister you do not want to lead a brother into temptation by the way you dress (Matthew 6:13).  We must respect and love our brothers enough to help them with this issues that is thrown in their face every waking hour. Goodness knows they have enough temptation coming at them from the internet, media, billboards, magazines ect. They should have a safe haven when they come and spend time with sisters in Christ. They should not have to worry about putting their blinders on when they enter a church building but sadly enough this is not the case. It breaks my heart to see Christian women dressing just like, or worse then women of the world. Dear sister not only are you suppose to protect and respect the eyes of your single brother in Christ but always the eyes of your dating, engaged and married brothers as well. Ladies, you may not be aware of this, but when you wear a low cut top to get the attention of the handsome boy you have a crush on, you get his attention and you also get the eyes and attention of every man in that building.   Not only are single brothers looking at you  but your dear sister’s husbands, are staring at you and seeing you too.  I pray that as strong men of the Lord they quickly turn away but remember men are visual so this is a temptation for them.  Please keep your body to yourself and reserve it all for the eyes of your sweet future husband or your husband, for my married ladies. By this not only are you respecting your body but you are also respecting your brothers thoughts and you are respecting other sisters in Christ as well, who will gladly thank you for dressing modestly in front of their husbands.

            You are all beautiful and your Lover, King Jesus thinks so too. Please dear one, do not become insecure of your beauty and worth in this world. Cover yourself and respect your body. You are the biggest role model for all the middle school and high school girls who see you each day. They watch you. Please let them see a role model who is honoring the Lord in all she does, and who is respecting her body, guarding her brothers eyes and respecting her sweet sisters in Christ, all while being a adorable woman of the King!

             

“Chasing after my True Lover”

            My wonderful church, here in Atlanta, finished up an amazing series of messages entitled “Boy meets Girl” about three months ago. What a blessing to hear this series. So thankful that my pastor took a stand on numerous issues that we as singles face in the dating world today. It is hard enough in this world as a Christian but as a Christian female in the dating area it is literally a nightmare. Someone please rescue me and my fellow sweet, sisters in Christ from the media telling us that we must have a boyfriend and from the magazines shouting in our faces“10 Ways to Make Him Fall for You.”  Since when did we become the ones “hunting” the men?  I am so sad to see many young girls these days literally throwing themselves at boys just to feel needed and wanted in this world. My heart breaks for these beautiful sisters doing anything just to achieve the love of an earthly man. I want to scream out to them, “Gorgeous sister, you are treasured, you are cherished and you were fought for by your True Lover, Jesus.” The Lord has placed a few things on my heart after listening to this wonderful talk. Through this I have taken away two main points. One, I must have my roots completely grounded in my one true lover, Jesus, before even starting a relationship and two I must trust Him in all of this. I must have trust in the Lord to bring me my prince charming.

            Where is your true happiness and love found? Is it in trying to catch the eye of the handsome man across the room or in trying to become the best Christian woman and future wife you can become? I encourage you sweet sister, that during this time to chase after your one True Lover.  Seek His face and grow in Him. You must be fully rooted in Him before you even think about a dating relationship with an earthly man, who will make mistakes and fail you. I often hear sweet sisters say “that if I just had a boyfriend, everything would be fine and I would be happy.” Dear, sister that is a lie from this world, from the media, and from magazines flooding the racks of stores everywhere. As a fellow sister in Christ I beg you to not enter a relationship with an earthly man with that kind of approach. You are setting that relationship up for failure. No earthly man can give you unfailing love like Jesus can and please to not put that kind of pressure on a brother in Christ. While, I truly believe in a boy and girl meeting, getting married and staying married for life, if you put all your hope in this earthly man when he fails you, and he will, the relationship is going to come crumbling down. This is one reason why the divorce rate is so high because we as women have the mindset, that if I have a man then all my hopes, dreams and fairytales will come true and dear sister that is not reality. While an earthly man can provide you with wonderful love and companionship through this life together he cannot provide you with that deep, perfect, unfailing love.  Jesus is the only man who can bring you that love and peace and you must find your true love in Him before reaching out for the love of an earthly man.  The Lord is jealous for you dear sister and He wants all of your attention and love. He wants to be your one and only.  He wants all of your heart and wants you to seek him in everything, including men. I love how many of us think that the Lord would not be able to pick out our mate but whom better then to pick out our husband then our heavenly Father.  After all, He knows us the best right? He created you, so of course He does.  My dear sister, if you trust in Him for your salvation then you must trust Him with your love life as well. You must place complete trust, peace and rest in His arms through this time.

            As Christian women we must be fully trusting in the Lord Jesus and knowing that He is able and will bring us the desires of our heart ( Psalm 37:4). I am not sure if you are like me but this is something that is hard for me. To completely surrender to the Lord and say “Lord, I trust you to bring my future husband to me.”  I must surrender that though and believe and trust in the Lord for that desire, otherwise I am going to be a wreck in knowing which man is for me and which one is not. (Psalm 37: 7).

“ You will keep in perfect peace him whose mind is steadfast, because he trust in you. Trust in the Lord forever, for the Lord , the Lord, is the Rock eternal. “ – Isaiah 26:3-4

I claim this over you dear one. I pray that you and I will trust fully in the name of Jesus in this. That we will trust and have perfect peace as we wait on the Lord to bring our “number 2” man into our life , because remember, Jesus holds our number one spot.

The Lord promises He will not withhold any good thing from us as we walk with Him. We must trust and believe that. (Psalm 84:11).  Take courage in knowing that the Lord can already see this in your future. He can already see what your future looks like and He calls us to simply walk with Him through all of it (Philippians 3:14).  

            One more thing the Lord placed on my heart through hearing this series is that as we wait for our future husband, as future Christian wives we should be praying for our man. I encourage you sweet sister that as you wait, lift your future husband to the throne of Jesus. The Lord knows exactly who your future husband is, so He knows the name that you are lifting up to Him, even though you may not. Pray that your future husband will look to the Lord as the head of his life ( 1 Corinthians 11:3, Ephesians 5:23). Ask the Lord to bless your future husband with the mind of Christ today and to renew his mind in Christ ( 1 Corinthians 2:16, Romans 12:2). Dear sister, pray for your husbands eyes, that he will not be tempted in this evil world by the evil things of this world (Matthew 6:13, Psalm 37:27-28). Ask God to open your future husband’s eyes to see the mercy of God and faithfulness in this world today. (Lamentations 3:23, Psalm 27:13). Ask the Lord to guide your future husbands feet today directly towards the Lord (Proverbs 4:25-27, Psalm 128:1).  

I am praying for all of you as well and knowing that the Lord has a wonderful plan for your life and has a wonderful man to lead you in this life to bring glory and honor to the name of Jesus together ( Ephesians 5:31). What a beautiful picture. Marriage is a walking example of the relationship we have with Christ (Ephesians 5:25, 32). Get ready dear sister. Pray and prepare to become the woman of your future husband’s dreams!

Be Careful Little Eye What You See

“I will set before my eyes no vile thing. The deeds of faithless men I hate; they will not cling to me.” Psalm 101:3

“Fifty Shades of Grey” and “Magic Mike” have both become big topics on every media outlet and as a Christian woman in this world I feel the need to share my opinion on this book and movie that have taken over my facebook wall and twitter feed.

            Let me start by saying that this is only my opinion and how I will live my life as a woman of the Lord. I do not judge any sweet friends who have read this book or gone to see this movie and I respect every ones opinion on this but for my Christian lady friends I urge you to please consider all this before reading this book or going to see this movie. I will add that I have not read “Fifty Shades of Grey” or seen” Magic Mike” and I do not intend to do either of those because of three reasons: It is not honoring to my King Jesus, it is not respectful to my future husband and it is not beneficial to my mind.

            As a child of the King I am called to be set apart from this world.  I am a daughter of the King and I am supposed to be a light to this dark world.

“You are the light of the world. A city on a hill cannot be hidden.” – Matthew 5:14

 How can I be a light to this world if I submit to this world?  How are my eyes and thoughts fixed on different things, then of this world, if I say that reading “Fifty Shades of Grey” and watching “Magic Mike “are both fine for me to do? I am bought with the perfect blood of Jesus. My True Lover gave His all for me and I must stand up and follow His commands in this or I am no different then any other female in this world. (1 John 2:4). As a Christian woman I am suppose to be praying everyday and asking the Lord to guide and protect me from the evil one and the evil in this world, which includes evil in the form of books and movies ( Matthew 6:13). I know some of you might say, “Well that is crazy, it is just a book or it is just a movie” but sweet sister, is it? (1 Corinthians 15:33) What are you letting your eyes feast on when you watch “Magic Mike” and what are you letting your mind immerse in, when you read “Fifty Shades of Grey?” Magic Mike is three or more of Hollywood’s biggest named actors portrayed as strippers and pimps. How is that honoring your King dear sister?  As Christians we fight to end human trafficking in the church.  We tell men in the church that pornography is wrong and if our boyfriend, fiancé, husband or pastor is caught doing it their ministry and family is at stake. So what are we as Christian women doing? We ask and expect our brothers in Christ to guard their eyes, yet we think it is fine for us as women to watch and see these wicked things?  Dear sister, as a future Christian wife we are also suppose to guard our eyes and mind for our future husbands.

            I do not know who the Lord will place in my life to marry but I can say right now that I love him enough to say that I will not go and watch a Hollywood movie with half naked men in it nor will I read a book that makes me have unclean thoughts.  I want my eyes and my mind to be as pure for my future husbands as they can be. I adore my future husband that much already to save myself for him ( Proverbs 31:10).  . Ladies, I urge you to flee from this book and movie that is filled with sexual immorality.

“ Flee from sexual immorality . All other sins a man commits are outside his body, but he who sins sexually sins against his own body. Do you not know that your body is a temple of the Holy Spirit, who is in you, whom you have received from God? You are not your own; you were bought at a price. Therefore honor God with your body. “- 1 Corinthians 6:18-20 

 Honor your body beloved because in doing this you honor your future husbands as your bodies will become one in marriage. (Ephesians 5: 31).  In this I am not only respecting my future husband but I am also guarding my mind.

 Sisters we are suppose to guard our minds ( Philippians 4: 7). We are supposed to think on things that bring glory and honor to our King.

 “ Finally, brothers, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right , whatever is pure, whatever is lovely , whatever is admirable ---- if anything is excellent or praiseworthy ---- think about such things.” Philippians 4: 8

I am sorry but I do not see how “Magic Mike” or Fifty Shades of Grey” have apart in the life of a Christian female. Ladies, I urge you to please guard your mind and flee from the evil of this world (James 4:7, 1 Timothy 6:11).  Hollywood has made a mockery of the Lord in producing this movie and this book. Please join me in standing up and saying no to Hollywood in this.  Honor your King, Jesus, respect your future husband and guard your mind. I know without a doubt that there is nothing in that book or in that movie that I am missing out on, because I have been promised the Kingdom of the Lord (Matthew 25:34, Luke 12:31).